Revenge of the Bride of the Aquamaniac

It’s not a monster movie. It’s a supernatural thriller. From “Ed Wood”


Now that's entertainment!

I’m pretty sure I’ve seen every Godzilla movie in existence. (Yes, I even sat through the 1998 American version.) There was something delightfully and cheesily predictable about the Big G. Man wakes up Godzilla, Godzilla gets pissed, Godzilla proceeds to trash Tokyo/Kyoto/guest monster of the week while man looks on mouthing his name in strangely discombobulated fashion. Then, deus ex machina ending sends the big scaly menace to the ocean from whence he came. With only slight variations, this was your typical Godzilla flick.
So why the hell am I, a 32-year-old female with a pretty bland job, still wanting to get into the business of low-budget filmmaking? Maybe that saying about those who can’t act wanting to direct is true.
My magnum (or should that be minimum) opus is still nothing more than a script sitting in a desk drawer somewhere. About such topics as cinematography, special effects, sound, and casting, I know only what I’ve gleaned from books and from a lifetime watching silly movies. At this point my best work would probably make Ed Wood’s Glen or Glenda? look like a masterpiece.

Dutch for "Big Giant Rat Fights Godzilla"

But I still have some burning desire to make my own Godzilla-style, man-in-a-rubber-suit monster movie. I don’t really care if it winds up at Cannes or in the bargain bin at the flea market. Filmmaking should be about creativity. As a writer with stacks and stacks of unsubmitted material, creativity’s what I have in spades. If this movie of mine ever comes to fruition, I might just be one of those writer/producer/director types. Like Orson Welles. Yeeeeah.
My spark of interest was reignited this summer when I went to see Super 8 with a friend. The main plot was secondary, at least to me, to the intrepid kids trying to make a zombie flick in the midst of chaos. I was reminded how so many of my creative heroes, from Sam Raimi to J.J. Abrams to Peter Jackson, started out with these “backyard” movies. Without those experiments as the basis, we’d have no Evil Dead, no Lost, no Lord of the Rings trilogy. Great oaks come from little acorns.
If and when I finally get the time…not to mention the money… to go ahead and produce this movie of mine, I think I know where to start. There’s a whole circle of amateur filmmakers in town. Bulletin boards, colleges, and Craigslist are a goldmine of talent. If I’ve learned nothing else living in Music City, it’s that there’s a lot of talented types who need to pay rent and will do nearly anything for cash. If I need actors and a sound guy and a camera operator, that’s where I’ll find them.

Godzilla loves Easter too

I’m sure if you’re still reading this, you’re wondering what this movie is about, anyway. Well, it’s really a monster movie (ahem, SUPERNATURAL THRILLER) and that isn’t too important. Let’s just say it features a really angry monster, a couple of suspicious Fish and Wildlife Service agents, a love story, lots of destruction and mayhem in Nashville, and an ecological message to top it all off. If that isn’t enough to hook you, go back to watching your crappy reality shows. You’re clearly not ready for its awesomeness.
And if you are, and you’re looking for a job, maybe you’ll offer to help. I promise to at least feed you and give you a copy of the movie, all right? It’s the least I can do for a fellow monster movie enthusiast and regular reader.
Note to my readers: I’ll be attempting to do a Post a Day for the remainder of October in preparation for NaNoWriMo next month. Look for a focus on the creepy, the supernatural and the weird…if you have stories to share, with permission, I’d love to hear them. Drop me a line at and help me make a plan come together!

~ by Howlin' Mad Heather on October 2, 2011.

4 Responses to “Revenge of the Bride of the Aquamaniac”

  1. ooh! Awesome, good luck with your dream 😀

  2. Twenty five years of experience as a film editor. I’m in. But if you’re going to feed me, I’m vegetarian!

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abandonen toda esperanza aquellos que entren aqui


You - philosophical, thoughtful, witty. Me - still thinks fart jokes are funny. We should DEFINITELY get together!

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