No Foolin’


You know, this story’s getting too far out, even for me. ~Our site mascot

Of course it’s April Fools’ Day. It’s a day to be ludicrous, ridiculous (or Riddikulus), silly, asinine, and generally as un-serious as possible. Because I’m fresh out of crazy stunts to pull today, I decided to use a little reverse psychology. As in, actually be serious.

Ted Stryker: Surely, you can’t be serious!

Dr. Rumack: I am serious. And don’t call me Shirley.

I’m letting you guys know this because, after all, if it happens, it’ll be on my blog. I’ve formally written a request to Dwight Schultz to interview him for P&Q. I don’t really expect a yes, but I won’t know until I try. While I’m on the subject of wishful thinking, here’s a little more of the foolish variety. I blame the site mascot, who is and always will be a Crazy Fool.

* Through a bizarre set of technicalities, it is revealed that I in fact won the EduClaytion March Movie Madness tournament after all. Or at least didn’t have my ass kicked in the first round. By Mary Poppins.

* At the next Mega Millions lottery draw, I win $218 million, buy a condo in Cape Town, South Africa, and am accidentally “discovered” to star as the female lead for District 10. I no longer have to rely on 2Summers to get my South African fix.

* The library is taken hostage by radical terrorists from the Falkland Islands. I, being in the boiler room at the time, get to play the role of John McClane  and the story is later made into a TV movie called Read Hard.

* Aliens from the Sirius star system arrive and explain that we Earthlings are welcome to visit anytime. Surely, they can’t be Sirius (we were guessing Betelguese all along).

* The networks decide to revive The A-Team instead of some drivel like Charlie’s Angels this fall. To save money, it’s filmed in Nashville.

* All my favorite bloggers get book deals this year. Through a long-lost relative’s inheritance money, I’m able to buy a bookstore and sell all of them. (Take that, Barnes and Noble, for screwing me over.)

* Our site mascot is revealed to be sane.

I want to know, readers, how you celebrate April Fools’ Day! Any great pranks you played or had played on you? Any wishful thoughs or fake headlines? Lemme hear ’em!

Don’t forget to click “Like” if you enjoyed this, or else the site mascot might fly the coop…again.

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~ by Howlin' Mad Heather on April 1, 2012.

11 Responses to “No Foolin’”

  1. Lol! Nice post. Good luck with the request to Dwight.

  2. Don’t feel bad, I was beat out by Snape in the first round. Mary Poppins? Okay, I would feel bad about that. but so did Maria von Trapp!!
    I haven’t had a chance to come up with any pranks yet, but the day is young….
    Happy April Fool’s Day!

  3. I don’t care if you won the lottery and can afford to buy a condo in Cape Town now. You better keep reading my blog anyway. And please invite me for a visit.

  4. Mary Poppins is a ninja with an umbrella and a bag of holding. She’s got serious skills. I wouldn’t feel at all ashamed to losing to her. At least you survived the experience. That’s more than most people can say. Chim chim cheree to you, my friend. Chim, chim, cheree indeed.

  5. I expect you already know this, but Die Hard 2 was based on a book.

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