Let the Games Begin!: Round 1, Day 2


LIVE from the first annual Fictional Character Hunger Games, let’s join our host in the Capitol, H.M. “Howling Mad” Templesmith, for a recap of the first day! The cannon has fired, so let’s see who made it on to Round 2!

“Well, folks, we expected a knock-down, drag-out in Round 1…and we weren’t disappointed! With Malcolm “Mal” Reynolds , that lovable scoundrel, taking on the man with the potions, Severus “Snivellus” Snape, only one would emerge triumphant. In the end Snape, by a snake’s scale, eked out a narrow victory, causing Slytherins everywhere to rejoice. His sponsor, Becoming Cliche, is supposedly sending him a hamper filled with newt’s eyeballs, dragon heartstrings, and Veritaserum in celebration.”

“So Snape will move on to a coveted spot in the semis. Whom he will face is still a mystery. But today, ladies and gentlemen, we bring you a most unusual matchup for the Games. Our contestants, aside from one, are all fictional characters. That one was so intriguing to the Game Makers that he was included in the competition. Who is he? I’ll let his sponsor tell you his story!”

“Don’t forget to vote for the contestant you think would win the matchup. If you do and leave a comment, you’ll be eligible for the special Hunger Games Viewers’ prize at the end of the Games. So for today, let’s geek out and enjoy this tete-a-tete of brainiacs. May the odds be ever in your favor!”

Our first tribute is none other than The Doctor (Doctor Who), sponsored by Matthew Hyde :

“Genius level intellect, with a talent for outside the box thinking. He’s a brilliant improviser, and if the rules permitted I’d quote the two page passage from a novel that suggests that he unconsciously bends the rules of probability (the odds are *always* in his favour!). Physically he’s more durable than a human, and if he gets killed he can always regenerate into a new body (although that might be cheating…)

He’s taken lessons in hundreds of fields from some of history’s greatest figures – he even taught some of them. He topples regimes for fun. He hates killing, but he’ll do it if he has to, and he hates anything that threatens children, so if he wins, he might just feel like stopping the Hunger Games himself…The most feared race in the galaxy calls him the oncoming storm and the destroyer of worlds. If the Doctor’s coming after you, start running…”

And, trying to out-brain him is Stephen Hawking, sponsored by 1PointPerspective:

“There are power wheelchairs which would help him negotiate some rough terrain. There’s no sip-n-puff option that’ll help him climb trees, fend off computer generated tiger-dogs, or even shoot a bow and arrow, but he’ll be able to convince the others to kill each other off and he’ll easily find a way to over ride the programming for the cyber tiger-dog thingies. Besides, as a man who is confined to his wheelchair, he misses out on participating in a lot of the death match reality games that so many of us take for granted.

Go Stephen Go!!!!”

“As a reminder, one vote per IP address, though you may campaign for your chosen tribute on social media or your own blog. The cannon will fire at 12 PM CST on Friday, August 10 and a new one-on-one will begin. Until next time, this is H.M. Templesmith signing off. May the odds be ever in your favor…”

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~ by Howlin' Mad Heather on August 8, 2012.

12 Responses to “Let the Games Begin!: Round 1, Day 2”

  1. Oh wow, I feel bad voting against one of the greatest scientific minds of our age, one that the Doctor would totally respect, but I’ve got to vote for my team. And working at Cambridge University doesn’t exactly prepare you for the Hunger Games…

  2. I had to vote for Hawking for several reasons. First of all, he’s my candidate. Secondly, I have no idea who Dr. Who is. Finally, I think with all the hoopla over the paralympics, no athlete is as physically challenged as Hawking, but still has “the right stuff”

  3. Steven Hawking was also in a Star Trek episode; so far as I know, Dr. Who wasn’t. I’ve gotta go with the Hawk.

  4. Voted! Wow! Great mash up.
    Am I in this Heather or did I miss the boat? If I am, I had better write my platform for the smackdown! No worries if I missed it. I was out of town… 🙂

  5. Sorry stephen but the Doc has my vote.

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