Heaven is a Place On (Middle) Earth

They can keep their heaven. When I die, I’d sooner go to Middle Earth. ~George R.R. Martin

I’m not sure why, but I’ve been thinking a good bit recently about the afterlife. This shouldn’t be the case: I am still relatively young, in good health, and don’t make a habit of holding poisonous snakes or racing motorcycles on the weekends. With any luck I’ll live decades more to come. So, the fixation on the hereafter…what’s behind it?

I’ve always been one of “those” kids, forever contemplating the greater mysteries in life. When the other girls were playing house and trading Lisa Frank stickers, I came across as the spiritual child of Lydia from Beetlejuice and Richard Dreyfuss’ son in What About Bob? I knew I was going to die. The only question was, when would it happen? And what exactly would it be like? Since nobody currently exists who can tell me, it was largely speculation on my part.

Like most carbon-based sentient life forms, I do want to believe in an afterlife. Maybe not the conventional idea of Heaven as a place with lots of fluffy clouds and immortal beings carrying around autoharps, but a kind of otherworldly place where there were no bills, no illnesses, and no losing football teams. If Heaven does exist, I would want it to be peaceful, serene, and jaw-droppingly beautiful. Some of these fictional locations might fit the bill just fine:

Asgard (Thor,  2011)

The realm of the mythical Norse deities, full of traveling portals, Ice Giants, flying horses, and what appears to be a Rainbow Road made of glowing Lucite. Awesome, especially if Loki is also there.

Rivendell (The Lord of the Rings trilogy, 2001-2003)

There’s quite a few places in Middle Earth I wouldn’t mind spending eternity. None can surpass the city of the Elves in sheer beauty and gorgeous choral music.

Pandora (Avatar, 2009)

With two qualifications: that no wacked-out humans were present, and that I could spent all eternity running around a rainforest as a nine-foot-tall electric blue cat person.

The Millennium Falcon (Star Wars Trilogy, 1977-1983)

I know it’s not a place, but the idea of a ship (with a properly working hyperdrive) to shoot around the universe randomly in is too tempting, especially if Han Solo is the pilot.

The Beast’s Castle (Beauty and the Beast, 1991)

Heaven is a kind of library, it’s said, and this is hands-down the best library ever depicted on film. The rest of the place is nothing to shake a paw at either.

The Land of Fantasia (The Never-Ending Story, 1984)

Hopefully, you know, before it got all eaten up and spit out by the forces of darkness. I’d also want my very own Luck Dragon for impromptu flights.

The A-Team Van (The A-Team, 1983-1987)

Whoever thinks heaven isn’t riding around vigilante-style with the four coolest guys ever, well, I pity that fool.

If you could spend the afterlife in a fictional place, or even a real one, where would you want it to be?

~ by Howlin' Mad Heather on November 26, 2012.

17 Responses to “Heaven is a Place On (Middle) Earth”

  1. I cannot wait for the Hobbit movies!

  2. Maybe the Millennium Falcon will take you to your final destination. How cool would that be?

  3. As usual you practically read my mind. I also would choose the Beast’s castle, Middle Earth or the A Team van. Also Hogwarts, as long as I didn’t have to study!

  4. I am pretty indecisive, I have given this type of question some thought but never really came to a conclusion that I have been happy with.

  5. I love the elfen home in the trees too! I just hope I don’t end up in the inbetween space making bumps in the night…. 🙂

  6. I guess I do like the idea of the heaven that I believe in, though I don’t ever think of it in those terms (in terms of being a place where I expect/hope to be someday). I believe in a heaven where we no longer have these same bodies, ailments, and concerns. A heaven where everyone just “gets it” and we don’t have to struggle with all of these big questions and doubts. A heaven where we know the answer and are at peace with it. I suppose that is my ideal heaven.

    • Well, now I need to watch Never Ending Story again. I really believe “heaven” to be exactly how you described it. We go home again, for a bit until we’re ready to put some clothes back on and head back out. I think that’s why some people do “get it” because they’ve been around the block, if you know what I mean.

  7. Why don’t you put some hunger games in there? Come check out my blog.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s


abandonen toda esperanza aquellos que entren aqui


You - philosophical, thoughtful, witty. Me - still thinks fart jokes are funny. We should DEFINITELY get together!

her name was cassandra

and she was a shining star

Sound Bytes Blog

Can you hear that?...It's baseball.

The Phil Factor

Where Sarcasm Gets Drunk and Lets Its Hair Down

Half Baked Log

Unsocial Media

La Perspective Parisienne

Insight From an American Student Taking on Paris

The Other Side

...the inane ramblings of an Aussie Pagan Aspie Housewife

Library Lost & Found

library leaders dropping knowledge


To be or not to be...married.

The Wish Factor

How did I get here...


Just another WordPress.com weblog

Elements of Madness

Cinematic Reviews, Recommendations, and More

Baseball For Dinner


Reel Girl

Imagining gender equality in the fantasy world

Five degrees of Tophat

Sarcastic writer. Former journalist. Terrible artist.

Ranting with Ranty

A Rant of Pure Rantiness

%d bloggers like this: